The Allowance Question

As your child gets to a certain age, you might begin to ponder the question about allowance. When this question came up in our home recently, my husband and I asked ourselves the following:

• What is the purpose of paying an allowance?
• Should it be attached to household chores?
• Who manages the money?

We know that we both felt it was time to teach our child about money management, spending and saving. We felt that our child had gotten to the age where it was time to transition from giving into the “May I have’s” (when we felt it was prudent) to the “Well, do YOU have enough of your own money to buy what you want?” stage.

In my research, I found a variety of answers and wide range of diverse responses on the allowance question. We were able to make the decision that fits best with our views on how a family and household should work (and as this is new territory for us, I cannot know yet whether or not that decision is the one that will work for us in the long term).

I thought I would share my research with other parents, so families can decide what works best for them when they face this question.

Tip Jar – a child is given money based upon age (a young child may receive pocket change; an older child may be given dollar bills). The “tips” are based on work and merit. That is, a standard rate is placed in the jar for the child doing chores as he is told to do them, and a bonus is given if the child does the chores on his own (without being asked).

Here & There – a child is given a quarter here and there for good behavior, having a good day, doing various chores in the home, etc.

Chore or merit-based – a child is given an allowance based upon chores. This ranges widely as follows:

• Allowance for set chores in home
• Allowance for picking up after oneself
• Allowance for doing school work
• Bonuses earned for good behavior, extra work, not whining, etc.
• Allowance cut for misbehavior

No Allowance – this is fairly common; many parents feel that the home is shared and therefore all who live there are expected to clean up their own messes, regardless of any monetary incentive.

Extra Pay for Extra Work – in both the “no allowance” and “allowance” homes, children often earn extra pay for doing work above and beyond their normal chores. For example, they might be expected to keep their room clean and pick their toys up out of the living room in the normal course of things. However, to lend a hand with the laundry or washing dishes (if that is not one of their normal chores) would result in a bonus.

As you can see, there are a variety of ways to deal with allowance and household responsibilities, and some of these methods are often combined with others.

An interesting book on the topic is First National Bank of Dad by David Owen, which actually suggests setting up a “bank account” for your child to help teach money management. The premise of the book is that the parents run a “bank” for their child(ren), with simple terms and strong incentives to save (a generous “interest rate”). It also suggests giving the children the freedom to manage their own money and learn from their mistakes. This is also something to consider even if you handle the allowance very simply – as parents we must decide if it is it better to bite our tongues and watch children blow a few weeks’ of hard-earned money on something cheap, breakable, or that will provide momentary pleasure (such as candy), and to let them see that earning more money takes a while, or if we should manage their money with a strong hand until we think they are mature enough to understand the system of earning, saving, and spending.

There is also the FDIC Money Smart program, which is a free financial education program on CD aimed at youth ages 12 to 20. I tried to order it, however the order form does not accommodate APO addresses. I used the “Contact Us” link at the bottom of the FDIC website, which led me to a Customer Assistance Form, to express my disappointment and ask them to accommodate overseas military family orders. I received a response that they will be making this change to their website. However, if this is a program you think you would like to order, please do not hesitate to contact FDIC and remind them that there are more military families serving overseas who would like to be able to order it!

Hopefully each and every family will find the balance that works best for them!

Wendy, guest blogger

The ROK rocks

You might not have noticed that we have a great variety of rocks to check out right here on Osan Air Base. There are big ones, like the ones right out in front of Hallasan Tower, all the way down to small ones used for landscaping at Turumi, at the swimming pool, and in the little stone pagodas scattered around base. Almost all kids love rocks!

To start with, right in front of Hallasan, there are some nice big gneiss (pronounced 'nice'), which is a common metamorphic rock. You can see the mineral bands that have been curved as a result of tremendous heat and pressure inside the earth.

Also in front of Hallasan Tower are some nice chunks of igneous rocks, probably diorite. They are located around the mailbox. The benches in the entryway and the ones on the playground are made entirely of two different types of highly polished igneous rocks, probably diorite (the darker ends) and granite (the lighter bench portion).

And, don't ignore the little rocks! Pumice can be found in many places around base, like around the base of the electronic sign at Turumi. Many of these will float, at least for a little while, until the air holes fill with water. Nice smooth white Quartzite can also be found at Turumi: look near the bike racks as you come out of Rickenbackers. The smooth gray rocks in the pagodas are also probably a variety of quartzite. The small rocks are great for learning about rocks, but they also make awesome math manipulatives. Just put them back when you're done!

If you want to learn more about rocks, minerals or geology, check out these sites:

Kids OLR

Kidsgeo.com

Kidinfo.com

Korean Veggies: Love those Leeks!

The Osan Commissary has a nice little selection of organic local veggies- you can find them as you go past the check-in desk, and often they're very inexpensive. They're in a refrigerated case on the left side as you enter the produce section. But some of that stuff is pretty weird; what to do with it? Here's an idea for using local leeks (usually on the bottom shelf; they look like large, long green onions):

POTATO-LEEK SOUP

1 package leeks

4 large peeled and chopped potatoes

1 head cauliflower, cut into chunks

Garlic cloves, roasted, or minced garlic in an amount that suits you

Chicken bullion or chicken stock

Wash the leeks well; they can have silt and sand in the 'branches'. Slice them up and stir fry them in a little oil or butter until they're greenish-brown and flattened. If you're using minced garlic, add to the leeks. Cook the potatoes and cauliflower until soft in just enough water to cover them. Toss in a couple of bullion cubes or use half water and half chicken stock for cooking water. Add the roasted garlic, and mash the potatoes cauliflower up. Puree it in the blender, then put it back in the pan and add the leeks. Serve it with crusty bread for an awesome and healthy autumn meal.

LEEK-PECAN RAVIOLI

Cheese tortellini or ravioli (or choose another pasta)

1 package leeks, washed and sliced

Minced garlic, in an amount that suits you

1/2 cup chopped pecans

2 cups fresh or frozen veggies: chopped spinach, sliced mushrooms, green beans, or sliced zucchini will work nicely; use any veggies your family likes!

Shredded parmesan cheese

Quickly toast the pecans in a couple tablespoons of olive oil at medium high heat on the stovetop. They'll burn quickly, so watch them carefully. Scoop them out of the oil and set aside, then put the garlic and leeks in the oil until they're good and cooked; about ten minutes. Add the veggies until just cooked, put the pecans back in, and season to taste. Serve over the ravioli or tortellini with shredded parmesan on top.

Breastfeeding: Getting off to a good start

There's no question that breastfeeding can be a little bit tricky, especially in the beginning, but the bottom line is that almost everyone can be successful at it. You might have to look around a little, but there are plenty of helpful resources available right here at Osan. Here's how to get off to a good start before the baby is even born, and how to find help if you need it.

First, get a good breastfeeding book and read it before the baby is born so you have some idea of what to expect. There are some at the OPN parenting library at the community center available for checkout, and the Osan Breastfeeding Support Group has a bunch of great books to share, too. Email osanbfsupport@gmail.com to ask about their library. If you want to buy a book, 'So That's What They're For', 'The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding', and 'The Breastfeeding Book' are excellent choices. These books have everything you need to know to get started and address all the common problems new moms face. If you are having a problem, you can be sure that many moms before you have had them too, and almost any nursing problem can be solved. Most moms find that their problems are pretty much resolved and breastfeeding is going smoothly by about six weeks, so give it a little time!

When you get to the hospital, tell the staff you will be breastfeeding and that you don't want your baby to have any artificial nipples, formula, or glucose water. The 121 is pretty good about helping new parents out, and you can read a firsthand account of one new mom's experience here. If you are looking for alternatives to the 121, check out the 'resources' tab at Birthing In Korea.

Once the baby is born, try nursing as soon as possible. Newborns tend to have an alert period for an hour or two right after birth, and this is the best time to get started. Some babies will latch right on and never look back, but don't expect a lot right at first; some babies will just nuzzle or lick on the first try. To start, gently guide his or her head to the nipple while supporting the breast. The baby's mouth should be wide open with the bottom lip in the pouty position. If it hurts, don't be afraid to ask for help right away; problems are easily corrected if you address them immediately, but the longer they go on, the harder they are to fix. Probably the biggest worry most new moms have is whether the baby is getting enough milk. In most cases, the answer is yes. Click here and here for some things to look for to make sure.

Nurse on demand for the first few months. This means whenever the baby wants, for however long they want, day or night. Don't waste your valuable energy trying to get on a schedule. Babies often will drift into some sort of predictable schedule with little or no effort on your par, and if yours isn't one of them, you can tackle it a little later when you're getting more sleep. Avoid introducing a bottle or pacifier until nursing is well established, and skip them entirely if it suits you. Some babies will quickly develop a preference for an artificial nipple, because the flow is faster and takes less effort. If this happens, it can be difficult to reestablish nursing.

Korea is a great place for breastfeeding; you may have noticed nursing rooms at the shopping malls and rest stops, and you won't be made to feel uncomfortable nursing in public. If you're on any military base (or any U.S. Government facility of any kind) you are expressly permitted to nurse anyplace you are otherwise authorized to be, so nurse away! At Osan, moms often use the BX dressing rooms or the furniture department to nurse if they prefer a private area.

Contact osanbfsupport@gmail.com or join the yahoo group to find out about meetings and other resources. Here are some good online resources:

La Leche League

Kelly Mom

Breastfeeding in Combat Boots (especially for active duty moms)

Happy nursing!

Open letter to an Osan family

The military is a hard life. For the active duty member, for the spouse, and especially for the kids, who didn't choose this life. There are ton of generalizations you can make about military kids- some of them are positive, some are negative. On the positive side, they are great at making friends and adapting to change. You can drop them off in a foreign country and they'll fit in in a flash. On the negative side, military kids are often troubled by constant moves, loss of friends, absence of a parent, and fear of loss. To make matters worse, military parents may resist getting help for their kids, because they think it appears weak, because they don't realize there's a problem, because they don't trust military assistance, or maybe even because they're worried they might not get an overseas clearance for their next assignment. These attitudes are understandable, but potentially very harmful to our children and our families.

This afternoon, I chanced upon a kid peeing in the stairwell in Hallasan Tower. I was so shocked that he was able to take off before I could even figure out what to say. I didn't recognize him, and my efforts to identify him have apparently failed. I know he's not unique, because a friend of mine saw a kid relieving himself on a slide at the Hallasan playground a few weeks ago. Lest you think I'm overreacting, this kid was at least eight, and likely ten; not a toddler or pre-schooler who couldn't make it to the bathroom, as was the one my friend saw. Because I am concerned about these kids (and because I don't care to live in a place where I have to wade through human waste to get to the playground or mailbox), I'd like to share an open letter to the parents of this kid and other kids who are like him, who are showing signs that they are seriously troubled. If you think you might know who the kid is and just don't want to say, please at least reach out to the family and offer your help.

Dear Parents,

I'm worried about your kid. I saw him peeing in the stairwell, and that tells me he likely has a serious emotional problem. Maybe things have been slowly getting worse at your house for a long time, and now they've been so bad for so long that this seems normal. Sure, kids of all ages do all kinds of ridiculous, thoughtless and messy things, but acting out in this way is NOT normal behavior. Click here to see some of the characteristics of troubled children. They include inappropriate aggression, and peeing in the common areas of our community definitely belongs in this category.

If some of the signs look familiar (aggression, age-inappropriate behavior, deteriorating performance/behavior, attention issues), please seek help for your family right away. While it can be difficult to get the help you need here, there are things you can do. Family Advocacy has resources that can help, or look for some online assistance at Military One Source, or other online communities such as MilitarySOS.com. Talk to his teacher to see how he acts in school; maybe a counselor or school nurse could provide some help. Try the chapel or a pastor at one of our local off-base churches. Google for information, or order some books, or ask a trusted friend or family member to assist you. Don't be afraid to break the silence; the stakes are high, and your kid is depending on you to help him. Nothing is more important.

I'm not just a community member disgusted and annoyed by pee outside my door; I'm someone who is worried about your child. He is crying out for help. Please listen.

Anna, guest blogger

Directions: E-Mart

Try some local shopping this holiday season! E-Mart is the closest equivalent to Target in Korea. In fact, E-Mart stores used to be Wal-Mart stores, but Wal-Mart failed in Korea. You'll see why when you go to E-Mart. It has a whole different feel.

When you get to E-Mart, you can "rent" a shopping cart for 100 Won. Put the coin in the coin holder on the handle of the cart and separate it from the line of carts. When you return the cart, plug it back in to the line of carts to get your coin back.

Also, Korean stores do not provide shopping bags unless you ask. They also do not back your merchandise. Take shopping bags with you or expect to pay a small fee per bag. If you take bags, you get a small credit back on your purchase per bag.

Finally, E-Mart does have a frequent shopper card, but to get it you may have to take someone with you who speaks Korean. They do take your American credit card.

There are two E-Marts in the vicinity of Osan AB. Here are directions to each.

To E-Mart in Osan:

• From the main gate, turn left out of the gate.


• Follow the road until you see a building that seems to sell toilets on the first floor and a sign reading "Hospitality House" on the second floor.


• Turn right at Hospitality House (this takes you to the Beta/Morin Gate on the left)


• Go past the gate and keep going until you get to the stop sign. (Note: This intersection is a notorious accident spot, so look out! Especially for traffic that doesn't expect you to stop at the sign.)


• Turn right at the stop sign


• Drive over the over pass and to the "Little 1"


• Turn left on the "Little 1"


• Follow the little one north (as though you are heading towards the "Big 1" for about 15 minutes.")


• Look for E-Mart (yellow and black sign) on the left.


• To park-drive to the light past E-Mart and turn left. Take the first left you can take down a small road. Then take the next left to get around the block back to the road next to E-Mart. There is an underground parking deck with a parking attendant waving you in on the right.

To E-Mart in Pyeongtaek: (This is the easiest way for most people, but there are many possible routes.)

• From the main gate, turn left out of the gate.


• Follow the road until you see a building that seems to sell toilets on the first floor and a sign reading "Hospitality House" on the second floor.


• Turn right at Hospitality House (this takes you to the Beta/Morin Gate on the left)


• Go past the gate and keep going until you get to the stop sign. (Note: This intersection is a notorious accident spot, so look out! Especially for traffic that doesn't expect you to stop at the sign.)


• Turn right at the stop sign


• Drive over the over pass and to the "Little 1"


• Turn right on the "Little 1"


• Follow the "Little 1" south for about 15 minutes.


• When you pass under Route 40 (major interstate/highway overpass), you will see E-Mart on the left.


• Do a U-turn at the lights


• Turn right down the small road on your right


• Turn left when the small road intersects/ends at another road. This takes you in to the E-Mart parking lot.

Fall Nature Activities around Osan

Fall has come to Korea! The pumpkins are in at the commissary, the leaves are turning color, and the gingko stinkberries are covering the ground. We are still getting some nice days to get out and get some fresh air, so take advantage of the pleasant weather while you can! It was really cold and windy by the end of October both last year and the year before.

Here are some fun ideas:

Do a fall nature walk- make a list of things to find and give each kid a bag. Even the littlest ones will love to collect things. Leaves of different colors, pinecones, bugs, and rocks are easy to find. Even stinkberries, if you're brave! Take a sketch pad and draw pictures of what you see: birds, trees that are losing their leaves, tree barks with different textures. Click here, here and here for some more ideas.

We don't have a lot of places here where we can really get outside, but here are a few you can try: the garden (located behind the hospital and in back of the PDE/School Age building), the lawn in front of Turumi, the MVV playground and surrounding areas, and the little park by the pool.

And for those days when it IS too cold to go out, get a bag of the mini-pumpkins at the commissary and let the kids go crazy decorating them with markers or poster paint, then make some hot chocolate and popcorn and enjoy the indoors!

Oh, NOOOOO! It's holiday shopping time!

It might seem pretty early, but if you're internet shopping at Osan, you better get clicking. Items shipped parcel post routinely take 6-8 weeks, and could take longer in the holiday rush. Bigger items, especially, can be slow, and you don't want to have to try to explain why Santa didn't make it this year! Likewise, if you're sending Korean goodies back home to the states, ship them as soon as possible; you won't be sorry!

Do check out the BX before you start shopping online, to make sure they don't have what you want. If you see something you want, snap it up because it won't be there long. The same goes for Christmas decorations and other items.

If you're having trouble, here are some ideas that might help. Try buying smaller items, or items with less packaging to cut down on the size of the box. Priority mail will get here much faster, but there is a size and/or weight limit on the box. Click here to see eco-friendly toys from Amazon. These toys often have less packaging, and Amazon does a great job shipping here in a timely manner. The OSC has a list of companies that ship APO here; just scroll down to the section called 'Internet Shopping'. You can also get an account at APObox or Ship it APO. They will provide a U.S. street address for shipping, then forward your purchases to your APO box for a reasonable fee.

And, if you're looking for other alternatives to the usual toy orgy, click here for some other ideas.

Korean Alphabet

When teaching your child the alphabet overseas, in korea, this is how its done.

A is for
AFN
Anti Terrorism
Anthrax
APO AP
AAFES
A10s
B is for
BX
C is for
Commander Channel
Curfew
Class 6
CAC
D is for
DoD
DSN
DECA
DMZ
E is for
EOR (End of runway)
E Club
F is for
F16s

Flu-mist
G is for
Gas Mask
Giant Voice
Ginkgo Tree
H is for
HAWC
I is for
In processing
J is for
JAG
Jeju
K is for
KJI (Kim Jong Ill)
Korea
L is for
LES
M is for
MPF
Main Gate
MOPP
N is for
NEO
O is for
OPSEC
O' Club
OPN
P is for
Pass and Registration
Patriot Missle
PCS
PSC (part of the address)
Q is for
Quarters
R is for
Reserves
ROK (Republic of Korea)
Runway

Ration card

S is for
Songtan
Security Forces
Shopette
Stars & Stripes

Space A
T is for
Town Patrol
TDY
Taxi
U is for
Uniform
V is for
Victory
W is for
WAR (Weekly Activity Report)
X is for
AFN XTRA (Channel 6)
Y is for
Yellow Sand
Z is for

ZEE ELEVATORS ARE BROKEN AGAIN AND I'M STUCK INSIDE WRITING THIS STUPID
LIST!!!!

Whitney, guest blogger

Osan AB loves comments!

Here at Osan, Services and the facilities love to get your comments, and there are online forms to make it super easy. Here's a list:

Click here to comment on Services facilities (Clubs, recreation, gym, dining, CDC, etc).

Click here to comment on the commissary.

Click here to comment on the BX or other AAFES facilities. Just click the little envelope icon on the upper left that reads 'email the gm'.

Click here to email (or call) the Commander's Action line. You can even be anonymous if necessary.

Click here to comment on the elementary school.

Click here to email the Principal at the high school. Just click on the link near the bottom of the page.

Help them out; let them know what you think!